Cracked Poetry: An Ode to Stress

I am starting a new series:  Cracked Poetry.  Poetry about real life, real things, and real problems.  And it can be really funny too.  No poetry about trees or flowers or fluffy clouds need apply.  But if you want to write a poem about washing the dishes while your toddler tantrums on the kitchen floor, please do.  Please feel free to submit.  It doesn't even need to be good... 


To open the series, here is a poem I wrote last night.  Enjoy.


An Ode to Stress By Pia Prenevost

Stress is my bedfellow

He steals my pillow

And farts under the covers

Laughing as I gag.

Stress is my dinner date

He suggests pasta Alfredo

and cheesecake

Smirks when my jeans are too tight.

Stress is my lover.

He holds me too tight

He takes all my time.

He is jealous of my joy.

My friend says Stress is a dick

But she sleeps with him too.

Stress gets around.

Let's face it...Stress is a whore.

I should kick Stress to the curb

And change the locks.

But he is like a nail fungus

Impossible to get rid of.

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(Note:  In no way is Stress 'code' for my hubby.  Just so you know.  My hubby rocks!)