The Thinking Person's Guide to Autism

It isn't just a uber-famous website filled with insightful, well written commentary on autism.

It is now a book.  One review says of TPGA's book:


"Refreshingly free of dogma, disinformation, and heavy-handed agendas, The Thinking Person's Guide to Autism is an oasis of sanity, compassion, and hope for people on the spectrum 
and those who love them."

-- Steve Silberman, senior writer for Wired magazine and autism/neurodiversity blogger for the
Public Library of Science (http://blogs.plos.org/neurotribes/)


Sounds pretty sweet, eh? 


What if I told you that I was one of the contributors??  I know, right!?!?!?!  I am freaking out!!!  


I will admit... I haven't read it yet.  But I looked at the contributing authors list and was WOW'd!  Launch day is tomorrow, so if you are interested in reading some amazing work by some amazing people (oh, and something by me...  how did I sneak in there???), check it out on Amazon!


My copy is in the mail!!

Wit and Wisdom from the Parents of Special Needs Kids

I have some exciting and crazy-ass news. 


Click me to buy.  Pretty please!

 My very first, official, honest-to-goodness, published-on-paper essay has just come out!  I have been honored to be part of this amazing group of writers! 

I am not sure I am terribly witty.

And wise?  Doubtful.

But humbled and honored...  most definitely. 

I will be passing on more about this compilation in the near future, but I just had to tell you right away. 

Gravity Pulls You In

I have been asked to participate in the Best of the Best Blogger Book Review and Giveaway!  Numerous bloggers are getting together and reviewing books that they have have particularly helpful and moving.  Please check out all of the wonderful reviews, and hopefully get yourself a free book!!

As you know, I do have a policy of reviewing materials.  So in the spirit of full disclosure, my choice for the Book Review is one in which I already have some personal connection with:  Gravity Pulls You In: Perspectives on Parenting Children on the Autism Spectrum (Eds: Kyra Anderson and Vicki Forman).  One of the editors, Vicki Forman, is a friend of mine and has written one of the best memoirs I have ever read, This Lovely Life.  I have previously reviewed it here.  So when this book came out I was fairly sure it would be brilliant. 

And it is.

Gravity Pulls You In is a series of hauntingly honest and poignant essays and poems reflecting the experiences of parents raising their children on the spectrum.  This is not an advice or treatment book.  This book will not necessarily be the "chicken soup for your soul". Nor is it a book of rants by disgruntled parents. Instead, these are carefully crafted and honest reflections that will touch you deeply.  Every time I read one of these pieces I grow a stone in my throat, my eyes mist, and my heart is squeezed rather painfully. Prepare to be moved.

I recommend a bottle of wine with this book.  Yes, the whole bottle. 

And in the spirit of the Best of the Best Blogger Book Review and Giveaway, I will draw a name from those who comment here (or drop me an email if you are shy) and that lucky person will get their very own copy of Gravity Pulls You In.  But you only have until April 30th to respond!!!

I Need More Mercy

Well, I still really can't talk about IT.  I will, someday. 

But we did have a Big Meeting.  A five hour Big Meeting. In all fairness, there was a lunch and pee break in there, so it was probably only four hours.  And some things were ironed out, discussed, and hopefully put on the good path of righteousness and virtue.  Clearly, communication on both ends has been less than ideal (Us included.  Hey, I own my sh*t).  Cautiously optimistic and hopeful am I.  The ultimate decision, however, was.... and hold on to your hats.....drum roll please....  we need to have another meeting! 

*sigh*

It's okay, in a way.  It needs to happen.  But given the ulcer-inducing level of stress this has been over the last few weeks, I am sure this will take 10 years off my life.  Seriously, while one can live on four hours of sleep at night (damn insomnia) and it is great to lose 7 pounds in a two week period (related to stress-induced nausea), I am not sure my creaky, aging body can handle much more. 

I used to be cute.  I guess J-man is going to have to be cute for the both of us. 

The only thing that kept me remotely sane (aside from J-man, my hubby, and the great lot of you who have emailed, called, or personally given me support... you rock my world, people!) was my re-reading of the Mercy Thompson series.  I just can't help it, that vampire fighting, coyote-shapeshifting girl mechanic with her werewolf-love-triangle just hits me right here. It is this awful guilty pleasure... like confessing you like Barry Manilow or that you eat cold SpaghettiOs out of the can.  I do read literature. I do.  But there is nothing like the cavity-inducing brain candy of the Mercy books to make me forget my troubles and get lost in the trials of having hot werewolf men chase after you (in a good way) while battling vampire demons or fairy queens or whatnot. 

I re-read all five books.

And now they are all done, and I need more Mercy. 

So dear Ms Briggs, if you are reading this, please hurry.  My sanity depends upon you.

Review: Play To Talk by Dr James MacDonald & Dr Pam Stoika

(Please see my brand-spanking new review policy)

Ok.

 Let me just say this. 

This sh*t works. 

I bought this book on Amazon.com about 2 months ago at the recommendation of some friends I met on the Natural Late Talkers Group and the Communicating Partners Yahoo Group.  At that time, with the recommendations from the Camaratas, we were searching for ways to better focus our efforts on building social interaction and communication.  From the back of the book:

Based on 30 years of clinical research, Play To Talk empowers parents with proven strategies and step-by-step instructions to help children of any age learn talk and develop essential skills for conversational relationships and social interactions.  This program turns everyday play sessions and social interactions between your child and family members into opportunities to foster language development, relationship skills, and positive behavior -- without taking the fun out of being together.

The basic principles of this book are the following:

Every day, practice the five strategies that have helped many children talk.

Balance:

Talk about as much as your child; wait and take turns.

Match:

Talk in ways that are possible and interesting for the child.

Respond:

Talk about your child’s immediate experiences and ideas.

Share control:

Allow both you and the child to lead and follow equally.

Be playful:

The more enjoyable you are, the more your child will talk.

Play To Talk is designed to be a very practical, very hands-on, and very approachable book for parents whose children are struggling with communicating, social interaction, and talking.  At 232 pages, it is a quick, easy read. It is written for the lay-person; for PARENTS. It challenged a lot of my preconceived ideas about "teaching" J-man to talk, and highlighted many of the 'bad habits' I had that were actual barriers to building communication with J-man.  The book provides examples and practical ideas to implementing these strategies.

I will admit that... as with every new thing we try.... I went into this with a skeptics' eye.  There are elements of the strategies that are difficult to wrap your head around.  For example, the idea of balance was a difficult one for me.  To talk about as much as J-man meant.... errr... not talking.  Or at least, not talking much.  But here's the kicker:  It worked.  It actually worked.  Within a few weeks, J-man has increased his communication attempts and his desire to communicate.  My mother, who had been away traveling and hadn't seen him in several weeks, was amazed at the difference in him. 

Play To Talk is a little hard to get your hands on.  It is offered on Amazon.com but when I purchased it, the book was out of stock.  I ended up having to purchase it used through one of the Amazon's affiliates.  I have since learned that contacting Dr MacDonald though his website is another way to get the book.  I also learned that his other book, Communicating Partners, has the same principles but IS in stock.  However, I haven't read that one.  Yet.

Two big thumbs up.

When Mommy Gets Choked Up

We are starting to work on improving J-man's interaction skills. 

As pretty much every parent in our position probably does, I am reading books.  Lots of books about building interaction, language delays, etc.  The current manual:  Play to Talk by James MacDonald and Pam Stoika.  I am only 60 pages in, but so far I can give it two big thumbs UP.  Without spending large amounts of time explaining the program, let me just say that right now the current take-home message I am getting is that I need to chill out and simplify simplify simplify. 

So that is what I did today.  Chilled out and simplified.

And we have had a brilliant day! I wish I could tell you all the ins and outs, but I can't articulate it.   Now, don't get me wrong:  J-man was as much of a butt head than he always is.  But he was more present.  I was more present.  The overall tone of interaction improved.  There was MORE.

For example, J-man was in the tub this evening, chattering away to himself in his Martian talk while I putzed around getting his jammies ready. I walked up the stairs and stopped a couple of steps away from the top, perched my face on the top stair and was watching him in the tub. No words, no mom-in-his-face, just simply present.  Then J-man looked up, caught me watching him, and calmly said " Hi Momma".

Allow me to repeat that.  He said "Hi Momma".

I was stunned. I said " Hi Jonathan".

He repeated "Hi Momma".

And he went back to playing.  Let me tell you, I can honestly say I have never heard him greet me like that. Genuine, real, not prompted. I can't help but get choked up about it.

Yep, two thumbs up Dr. MacDonald.

Two BIG Thumbs Up.

Books, I love. And Books I love.

Books. I love books. I always have loved books. As a kid I used to go to great lengths to read my books: under the covers with a flashlight, in the car, in the bathtub, at the movies. Yep, my mom will still tell stories about how I used to bring a book to the movies because... heck.... what else is there to do before and after the movie? And what if the movie is boring?

Exactly. I was... am... a complete, total, 100% geek.

Before I became a mother, I dreamed of reading aloud to my children. I would read my favorite books from childhood... the Little House Series, James and the Giant Peach, Winnie the Pooh. We would snuggle together in bed and stay up far too late reading stories. I would cave into all their pleas for 'one more story mommy'. A love of reading would flow into them from me, and we would share this one thing always....

*sigh*

J-man won't let me read to him.

I tried to do books at bedtime. I would try and read the words (think board books, people) and point to pictures, and he just wants to turn the pages or look at the pictures. I would just try labeling and he would sometimes watch me, but never expresses real interest. I am sure it is a language issue, plus a processing issue, plus another way to have my heart break. But, he is only three... so there is hope.

However, onward.... to books I love.

My Top Books From 2009

Ok, so this list isn't books published in 2009. Just books I read and really, really liked in 2009. Note: not all of these books are high falootin, fancy shamacy books. Some are just great trashy reads, some are brilliant works of art. I will try and distinguish them for you! Also note... they are in no particular order of greatness. I am not good enough to rank them!

1. Schuyler's Monster by Robert Rummel-Hudson. This wonderful memoir that has really affected me. Touching, funny and entertaining at the same time. See my "review".

2. This Lovely Life by Vicki Forman. This memoir just took my breath away. See my "review".

3. The Mercy Thompson Series by Patrica Briggs. Ok, so the previous 2 books are writing masterpieces. This series is just plain old Brain Candy. But really good brain candy. Pure candy, 100% no nutritional value whatsoever. Think Twilight, but good. Oh, and this is actually a series of 4 books, so it is kinda a cheat... but whatever. Paperbacks are cheap.

4. No god but God by Reza Aslan. Ok, complete geek book. In essence this is a book about the history and explanation about the Islamic faith. I picked this book up after I saw the author on the Daily Show with Jon Stewart. I found this book very interesting and well written. This is a book for the person who just would like to know and understand a little more about evolution of today's Islamic faith and how it effects the world today.

5. The Year of Living Biblically by A.J. Jacobs. Whereas #4 is a serious exploration on Islam, this book isn't nearly as serious. And yet, it is. The author essentially attempts to live the Bible as literally as possible for a year. It is very funny, interesting and educational. I laughed and learned at the same time.

6. Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden. Lovely novel, just lovely.

7. My Baby Rides the Short Bus by Yantra Bertelli, Jen Silverman, and Sarah Talbot. This is a wonderful collection of short stories and essays from parents with special needs kids. These stories are NOT the "chicken soup for the soul" type of stories, but are hard and real and filled with truth. (Confession: I think I actually read this in January 2010. Oh well)

So if J-man can't appreciate my love of books right now, maybe you can enjoy it a little.

(oh, and if you have any recommendations... pass them on!!!!)